(O)Mission Statement

(o)mission Statement: News & other content on this blog is purely fictional and imaginary. Readers believing it & getting hurt may do so at their own peril.

Friday, September 30, 2011

Joint Statement Of cowed down Pranab MOOkherjee and Poor Chi- Damn-Baram

North Blocked Reporter
New Delhi, Sept.30
Two senior ministers of UPA-United Progressive Allotment- Government have chosen for truce instead of truth. The tables turned after their meeting with Mrs.Gandhi the second, so addressed in line with royal tradition. Both the ministers held a joint press conference to press the point that they were neither erring nor warring. Both expressed their gratitude towards Sonia Gandhi, anarchy-tact of the truce. “It is on her insistence we decided to bury the truth..er..the hatchet.” said the ministers.

They Knelt down before the photo of Sonia Gandhi before issuing the Joint statement. Their statement is a classic example of the unbridled co-operation that exists among UPA mime-sters. Originally Fake News has got the original text. Here it goes.

P Chidu: I am
P Mockerji: happy about
PC: the statement
PM: made by
PC: my senior
PM: and anguished
PC: cool-eague.
PM: I accept
PC: his checkmate.
PM: As far as all of us
PC: in the government are concerned
PM: and worried
PC: the matter is over
PM: Watch out the space outside the Government for more. 

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Con-fidential Summary of the FInMin Note Prepared For So-nia, Yet So Far Gandhi


courtesy: Udayshankar
Our Poly-critical Reporter
Delhi Underbelly, Sept. 30
'2G or not 2G'- the eternal congress dilemma regarding spectrum scam is over as Madam G has come alive and probably kicking the erring ministers at long last. She took the ministers to task in the meeting at 10, Jan-apathy, says relianceable sources. 

Key issue on which the opposition is Locking horns is the note sent by the PMO-Pranab Mukherjee’s Office- to the PMO. The note is in public domain, but Originally Fake News has got a summary of the note which was submitted to So nia yet so far Gandhi on her insistence. Pro-NOP (not our problem) Mukherjee himself prepared the summary. Excerpts: 
Confidential
2G Note For SG :Joining the DoTs
Simple Interpretations Of Basic Facts Related to Pricing and Allocation of 2G spectrum:

The DoT precluded the role of Ministry of Finance, if any, in spectrum pricing. Then FM (read Chidambaram), sent a secret note to the PM wherein, an auction based mechanism was recommended for future allocation of spectrum. In a Telecom Committee meeting, the issue of entry fee was not discussed and the MoF Representative who attended the meeting did not raise the issue of revision of entry fee. 
To cut the long story short, WE ARE SCREWED either way.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Navratri Organizers Invite Bid for Recordings of CC TV cameras installed at Garba Venues


Vultural Correspondent 
Dandiya-bad, Sept. 28

Navratri, touted as the longest dancing festi-whirl on the earth and presumably in the entire solar system starts today. Before Navratri - the nine day festival of sin-ging & dancing, the Ahmedabad Police Commissioner has made it mandatory for commercial Garba organizers to install CC TV cameras at and around the Garba venues.

Taking a leaf out of Gujarat CM Narendra Modi's Copied Book,  organizers of Garba festival have decided to take the legal compulsions and dictates of law in  their stride and even encash these. According to the plan, they will auction one time broadcasting rights as well as perpetual rights of the content recorded on CC TV cameras on a daily basis. Enthusiastic organizers have christened See-See TV cameras as 'Chaniya Choli TV cameras' - Chaniya Choli being the trenditional festival's special dressing.

Many broadcasters have shown interest in the Cheeky-Chirpy TV content, say sources. Entertainment channels are keen on the Bollywoodish song & dance part whereas channels like whaM TV are anxious to get visuals of guys & girls hanging around the venue, ostensibly for their adult shows. 

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Chidambaram Clarifies : I Offered To Reign, Not Resign

PC(I), New Delhi, Sept.27

courtesy : Live Barath
Seriously troubled over Finance Mini stray's note to the PMO, whoME? Minister Chidambaram offered to resign yesterday. In a curious turn of events, his office has issued a clarification suggesting the Minister actually wanted to convey, ‘I am ready to reign (despite the allegations)’. The typist, not appointed by auction method, made a slip and punched ‘resign’ instead of ‘reign’.

PMO has issued a detailed clarification as well. It says the PM firmly believes Chidambaram would never offer his resignation and he is fully confident about it. PM also denied that there was any rift among the ministers, who knows Chidambaram well, on this issue. Sonia Gandhi, the G above 2G & 3G, kept mum and declined to comment on ChidedByMum. Pro-Nob Mukherjee, ‘Mr. Fix-it’ of the Congress, foxed it this time, believe many in the Congress party.

In the meanwhile, A. Raja, first generation causality of second generation spectrum allocation is eager to welcome his senior colleague Chidambaram to Tihar - the home for all 2G scam accused. ‘The home waits for the Home Minister’ said Raja with a wink; when asked for a quip.

Monday, September 26, 2011

After Tomatino, Ahmedabad Braces For Bullfighting


Spamdabad, Sept.26


Bull Fight, banned in Spain, has found unexpected welcome at Ahmedabad, mega city of Gujarat. Ahmedabad has a long tradition of catching the bull by the horns. Negotiating with stray uncontrolled bulls and not so sacred cows on the road is routine practice for the residents of Ahmedabad. This experience & expertise is likely to give local matadors an edge.

Spain had to ban bullfighting due to fierce opposition of animal right activists who termed it as barbaric bloody sport. Keeping in mind the reservations average Ahmedabadis have for rights activists of any kind, bullfighting organisers are hopeful to get red carpet reception. Government of Gujarat, desperate to develop tourism industry of the state at any cost, is in talks with Spanish bullfighting associations for the exchange of technology.

Apparently looking relieved, a tourism hawk said the best part of the bullfighting is Mahatma Gandhi did not utter a word on it though he had much to say on cows. The Mahatma considered cows sacred and successive states as well as central Governments have continued to treat the Mahatma as a sacred cow. Both the points leave ample room for government to arrange bullfighting at Mahatma Mandir, Gandhinagar.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

9/24 moment for US As Uncontrollable NASA Satellite Crash-lands : Al Qaeda Hand Suspected

Err..Bit Services
HoaxTon, Spet.25
Artist's Impression: Gra-fake Inter Planational

Free fall of NASA satellite in to Pacific Ocean has left many unpacified in US.  President Obama quipeed “yes, we canned (it) “and took a sigh of relief as the debris did not fall on 9/11 memorial. FBLie suspects Al Qaeda design in the crash and has started the hunt for clues. Moody’s is likely to downgrade US rating even further after the free fall resembling to Lehman Brother three years back. “After wall street, Federal government is losing control over its satellites and that is really unfortunate” said an official on condition of anonymity.

Al Qaeda operatives from unspecified location somewhere near AfPak Border have claimed responsibility for the accident. Recorded message on Qaeda-affiliated site declared it is the soul of Usama Bin Laden that is doing the tricks from heaven, situated just above the orbit of the crashed satellite. It has warned US for more such incidents.

Ex-president George W. Bush fumed it was high time for US to send troops in orbit to ensure peace and democracy. Talking to reporters from his ranch, Bush termed the event as 9/24 and added, “AL Qaeda should not misunderestimate US firepower. Every nation in the orbit has a decision to make. Either you are with us- plunging & crash-landing- or you are against us.”

Saturday, September 24, 2011

What will Paris Hilton do in Mumbai? A Fakesclusive Report

HollowWood Beau-raw
Mumbai, Sept.24

PayRis Hilton, famous for milking her famousness to the hilt, is on a three day visit to Mumbai starting from today. Official purpose of the visit is to launch her brand in India, the land of Mallika Sherawat and Freido Pinto. Speculations are strife over her other en-gauge-ments in Mumbai. Originally Fake News has got wind of some of her scheduled meetings.

An Evening Of Paris In Mumbai
'Matoshree' will be the first place Paris will visit in Mumbai to see Bal thackrey. Purpose of their meeting is to get ‘cultural clearance’ of her visit so that her public functions don’t get ransacked and her brand not burnt by Shiv Sainiks. Reliable sources add Thackrey Senior is keen to show the loo in ‘Matoshree’ that Michel Jackson used during his visit.

Raj Thackrey will be throwing Zunka-Bhakar party for Paris Hilton. She will meet Raj and together they will discuss the prospectus of Maharashtra NavvNirvaan ..er .. NavNirman Party in US and chances of its affiliation with the Tea Party. NCP boss and BCCI baron un-Shared Power has arranged her meeting with top politicians at Lavasa City. Paris will share experience of her fake election campaign and seek further guidance from Indian experts there.

Bollywood is simmering with excitement on this occasion. Paris is eager to meet Salman Can, says a source. They are likely to exchange notes on their tryst with the police after driving under the influence of alcohol, speeding and several other brat-ish offences. 

Friday, September 23, 2011

Govt. Acts Fast On Revising Poverty Parameters After Row: New BPL List To Include PM and MPs

Poor Rich Crazy-Bureau
New Delhi, Sept.23

Faced and defaced with fierce criticism over Planning Commission’s criteria for poverty line, the Government is seeking alternatives. A Panel headed by Mocktake SIngh Ah Uh Wah Ah has suggested  new parameters to define BPL.

courtesy: Subhani

Some of the salient points of the confidential report submitted to PMO, now in possession of Original Fake News, are as under:
  1. Family without a person appearing On TV News, discussions, Reality Shows, Contests
  2. No Sanity- tension. No `To Let` property
  3. No (clear majority in) House or dilapidated House (like present Lok Sabha)
  4. No land (for Samadhi in Delhi)
  5. No space for making independent decision
  6. No regularly elected person in the family.
  7. No access to safe drinking water to water down allegations
  8. Woman-headed household or House with a woman’s hold
  9. Funda-mentally challenged members of the House
Persons meeting any one of the above parameters will be issued new BPL cards if suggestions of the panel are accepted. PM is entitled for BPL under clause 3, 5, 6 and 8 according to the new report, informs sources. 

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Salman Khan's Next Film Sets New Record: Trailer Sold For Rs.15 Crore

Our Chorus-pondent
MumBhai, Sept.22

courtesy: Saumitra Kabra
SoldMan Khan, the new super stare of Bollywood, has one more record to his credit. The trailer of his next film `Bhai, Bhai & Bhai', produced by his brother ArreBas Khan, was auctioned for spinal chord breaking price of Rs. 15 Cr.

The trailer is slated for its worldwide release on NewTube and in theaters all over the world next  Friday. The name of the heroine is yet to be decided. Karina Kapoor, having similar score in her figure which corresponds her acting skills i.e. zero, has been approached for the role.

Producer ArreBas Khan declined to reveal the story. On further insistence however, he parted with a single line story exclusively for Originally Fake. According to him, the film has Salman in a triple role – as Bhai, Bhai and of course, Bhai. The story may require two more heroines. Khan revealed thaothey may go for mannequins to match up to Kareena’s  performance.

Aamir Khan reacted sharply to this development. He said ‘ this is ridiculous’ and added after a long pause, ‘why the hell I did not think of it?’ His wife consoled him and said she would make one more film for Aamir, ‘Washing Machine’ as a sequel to ‘Dhobi ghat’ so that Aamir can recover the losses of ‘Dhobi ghat’ from the trailer of the new film

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

What An Idea, Behenji : Mayawati Suggests Reservation for The Corrupt & The Tainted

GraftCraft News
Luck (for) Now, Sept.21

Courtesy: Satish Acharya: 
Bahujan Samaj Party Supremo and Chief Minister of UP, Mayawati is at it again. She has demanded reserved seats, this time for the corrupt and the tainted candidates in the institutions ranging from Panchayat to Vidhan Parishad and of course, Lok Sabha. According to her proposal, 15% of total seats should be reserved for the corrupt and 10% for the tainted. She firmly believes this will be of great help in controlling corruption.

Her logic is simple and disarming. By officially allotting 25% of the seats to the tainted and the corrupt, rest of the seats will be occupied by non-corrupt candidates. 'Babasaheb wanted to make our democracy strong' said Ms.Mayawati and added, 'the corrupt and the tainted leaders of all parties are very much part of our polity and we can not wish them away. We need to accommodate them in order to strengthen our democracy.' 

'Look at me.' declared confident Mayawati 'I have been accused of all kinds of scandals ranging from garlands of currency note to Taj Corridor Case. See how brazenly I fought back and have succeeded as a CM. '  Mayawati's demand has found support from broad spectrum of the political class. They have extended full faith in  Mayawati's proposal and said they are all for strengthening the democracy La Mayawati-way. 

She was furious when asked about her relationship with Julian Assange, the brain behind Wikileaks. This has set tongues wagging in Lucknow. Our Secretariat sources informs us that  there is already a file on the move for acquiring 10 acres of land near Lucknow for memorial dedicated to Julian Assange. It will be a shoe-shaped building, it is learnt.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

You are stupid if you do not fast in Gujarat, says Tata : To launch Nano Fast for common man

Modi to sign MoUs worth Rs.50 Lakh Crores for Next Round of State-wide FastFests.

MO-Use & throw Services
Gandhinagar, Sept.20

Caricature Courtesy :
Prabhakar Bhatalekar 
Ratan Tata was looking visibly Radia-nt after meeting Narendra Modi, CM of Gujarat. Talking to media persons, he said, ''You are stupid if you do not fast in Gujarat and ensure favors from the Government. I am impressed with the way CM has put Gujarat on fast track.’ Tata especially praised Modi's attitude of fasting from the front and said he must be commending for his imagination in coming out with innovative industry in itself, something which even a century old business houses like Tata with vast range of business interests could not think of.  

Enthusiastic over future of 'fasting industry', Tata add that he will ask researchers of Tata Institute of Social Sciences to work on Nano version of fast so that persons of all class, castes & creed can afford it. ‘I am on Nano fast myself, from lunch to breakfast and to personally observe how it works.` quipped Tata.

Other industrialists have taken the cue. Adani, the industrial magnet having solid bond with ‘the iron man’ - blame it on magnetism- said in a voice choked with emotion, ‘you can divide time in 2 eras. AD & Modi. In AD, fasting was associated austerity and compulsion for many but Modi's fast have proved a game-changer. Fasting is a booming sector now.  Modi is aiming to sign MOU worth Rs.50 Lakh Crores on the fasting industry alone during the next season of Vibrant Gujarat. 

Monday, September 19, 2011

Fakesclusive: Narendra Modi’s Original, Unedited Letter to ‘Dear Brothers & Sisters’


Sc-Oops Special
Gandhinagar, Sept.19

In a veritable first, Originally Fake has got a copy on original letter that Narendra Modi  drafted originally but was changed later on. The copy, now in possession with Originally Fake, bears deleted portions of the letter.

My Fellow countrymen Dear Brothers and Sisters
Jay Shriram Saadar Pranam,
Today, I begin my 3 days fast show of Sadbhavna Mission with (Media & TV Channels’) your blessings and good wishes. This Mission is totally dedicated to the civil society constantly critical of me and Prime-Ministership of the Nation. It aims at Unity, Harmony and Brotherhood among all constituents of NDA whose support will be necessary soon after Loksabha elections of 2014.
Twenty first century did not begin well for Gujarat. In 2001, the devastating earthquake on our Republic day, took a very heavy toll in the form of resignation of Keshubhai patel, then CM. I was air-dropped as a CM  thereafter. In the subsequent year, Gujarat became the victim of man-made, government connived communal violence. They We lost innocent lives, suffered devastation of property and endured lot of pain. One can visualize what all we have gone through only because of some sections of the media and some sane voices which my supporters and I love hate the most.
Those were very difficult and trying days, the demand for law & order, neutral probes,justice and those secular human rightwallahs, you know.. However, Gujarat has come out of these difficulties and successfully deviated public attention from damning issues, leapfrogged on the path of development. Today, Gujarat is progressing fast. The artificial atmosphere of peace, unity, social harmony and brotherhood generated by self-obsessed publicity blitzkrieg has given further impetus to the process of development.
The Indian history is a witness that casteism and communalism have never done any good to society. This is also my own firm conviction after being hounded by the failure and connivance of my own Government in 2002 .  I have Gujarat has understood this and having pretended to overcome these evils, it has adopted the path of Inclusive Development that includes even grazing lands  (Gaucher) of the state. We are committed to work for a enveloped developed Gujarat for a developed India.
My dear Brothers and Sisters! No State, society or individual can claim to be perfect. Who knows it better than me? I am grateful to all those who pointed out my genuine mistakes during last 10 years and have taken on my mud slinging fest without getting disheartened. I seek your blessings to serve the people of this country with devotion free from all legal and moral human shortcomings. As Chief Minister of the State, I have learnt to use the pain of each and every citizen in such a way that it works as is my own gain pain. Ensuring Justice to all is the duty of the State only after I leave that for the Centre.
The six crore people of Gujarat are working together for their own development and that of the State as I have led them to believe. The poorest of the poor is a partner in this process of making my claim for PMship bigger. and is confident that he will get the fruits of my development. Everyone has inculcated the State's ethos of 'Development of all Industrialists with Cooperation of all' (Sabka Saath Sab udyogpatio ka  Vikaas)".
During my fast, I will continue to pray to the Almighty to give me strength so that I do not hesitate to develop or refrain from keeping retain any ill-feeling or bitterness towards those who defamed Gujarat or me by making false allegations.
As it dawned to me off late, Our country is a shining example of Unity in Diversity. I am confident that with your blessings, this Sadbhavna Mission will further strengthen our social fabric which was torn apart in my regime.
I will also pray to God to give the requisite strength to all of us to keep mum and take this fake Sadbhavna Mission forward.
Vande Mataram!

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Modi's Fast For PRogress and harMONEY Enters Day Two : On The Spot ACcount

Hungry for live update on Modi’s fast? Report from Uni. Ground Zero

Our Fisting Correspondent
Ahmed-Not Patel-abad, Sept.18

Narendra Modi, the CM of Gujarat, is a man with the mission. Mission Impossible, some say, as he seeks to bury the past under University Convention Centre Ground as a means to build his prime-ministership upon it. A huge project of real estate development indeed. What he’s achieving in the process is primetime precursor to prime-ministership time in some cases, on eternally hungry and fact-fasting TV channels

Modi : Head bulging with ambition
FakeFast Photo
Ground Zero, from where Modi is trying to become hero, is already buzzing with PRogress & hard-money. In a rare display of candidness, main hall is divided in to many sections such as Gulbarga Society. Naroda Patiya  to name a phew! The kitchen has a Best bakery section. Part of the seats in the hall, reserved for government-discredited poets-writers, is known as Wali Gujarati Mandir. A group of Volunteers ‘Hum Paanch, Hamare Pachis’ (We five, Our twenty five) is ready to help visitors in every manner possible.
Speaking from the dais, aptly named ‘Newton Manch’, Modi said he felt the pain every now and then when he heard riots were becoming a thorn in his way to the throne. He said the state under his stewardship has in one grand sweep traversed a time span  of four centuries from Newton to Einstein in matter of 9 years. In 2002  Gujarat was in Newtonian state of action-reaction but the communal violence of 2002 and failure of State in curbing it is all merely Relative now. Lightening speed towards enlightenment, quip his supporters.

Yesterday night, after retiring to his rest room, Modi was busy penning his experience titled ‘Stay Hungry, Make a Fool’. Orient & BlackSheep has acquired rights of the book for an undisclosed amount.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Central Govt Mulls Heavy Entertainment Tax On Public Fasting

Eco-comic Brew-raw
New Delhi, Sept.17

Instead of eating words for his inflammatory speeches during the 2002 communal violence, Gujarat Chief Minister Narendra Modi has decided to go on a fast to ostensibly foster communal harmony. The scale of arrangements for Mr. Modi's three day fast has tempted the Central Government to come out with a novel idea of imposing an entertainment tax on this public 'fasting' show.

According to Finance Ministry sources, the basic formula of ET will be 18.69% of the total amount spent on the (fasting) show, its advertisements, hoardings and all related activities or Rs.1000, whichever is more. As a tribute to 6 Crore Gujaratis, Modi is expected to cross the Rs.6 Crore figure in the 'fast' show rather easily.

Notably, the total taxable amount will also take in to consideration the waivers given to `the fast show'. For example, the Gujarat University VC Pari-Mule Trivedi has waived off the Rs.22 lakh rental for the GU convention hall; however it will be added to the total taxable amount. In return, the organizers will be allowed to sell tickets for visitors; the printing of which will not require any separate permission. The tickets will be taxed at the rate of 30% of its price. 

It is reliably learnt that the Gujarat Congress had a hint of a new tax proposal coming, due to which its leaders chose the footpath as a venue for their fast. The rental of the footpath will be decided in consultation with local beggars and hawkers.
(with inputs from Binit Modi)

Friday, September 16, 2011

Rush To Secure Rights On Strategic Use Of Fast: Trademark-Patent Registration Office flooded with applications


Our Legal Co-respondent
New Delhi/Mumbai, Sept.16 


After mobile handsets, fasts as a strategy of street politics & political theatre are turning into new battleground for bitter patent wars. Political parties, civil society and NGOs of India are among those who want to secure their soul right to use fast as a weapon.

Con-grace, the oldest political party of India, has claimed its natural right as it was Gandhiji’s idea to use fasts as a socio-political weapon. Gandhiji had donned various caps, apart from Gandhi cap, in the party machinery for long time. He led stalwarts, not stall-smarts, as President of the party. To buttress its claim, Congress has enclosed various documents of the era when Gandhiji was synonymous to Congress.

National leaders of Bharatiya Jai-Neta Party on the other hand insist they have enough experience of starving as they are out of power for more than a decade. It gives them exclusive moral authority to practice fast as a strategy to gain power. Sushma Swaraj, leader of the awakard-position in the house, has threatened to begin indefinite fast in front of Patent Registration Office if her party is not awarded exclusive rights.

Civil society has taken different route. It is learnt they are eyeing for patent on ‘Remixed Fast’. They do not support claim of any political party and have invited well meaning, honest, starving people across the party line to join them.  Patent application from mentions ‘Upvas’ (fast) as ‘Jan Upvas’ (People’s fast) and has sought non-political exclusive rights.

Patent office sources indicate the file on fasts  will move fast only if it will be pursued with  threat of fast- preferably fast unto death.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Pak President Zardari Announces Four-day Goodwill Fast : Asks Victims of Mumbai Terror Attack To Forget & Move On


Fast Breaking News
Islamabad, Sept.15

Taking a leaf out of Narendra Modi’s three day ‘Sadbhavana Upavaas’ (goodwill fast), Asifali Zardari, President of Pakistan has declared four-day fast as a gesture of goodwill towards victims of Mumbai terrorist attack. Zardari said it was a much needed step for healing the wounds of terrorist attack in which many innocent Indians lost their lives.

Zardari in Office / AFP
Associated Fake Photo
Asking the victims to forget and move on, he said it is fashionable to defame Pakistan every now and then but it is not going to help as the Apex court has given him clean chit by not holding him guilty as yet.

Zardari candidly admitted it was Narendra Modi, Chief Minister of Gujarat, who inspired him for such a generous and harmonious act. The four-day fast of Zardari are meant for ‘peace, unity and harmony between Indian and Pakistan’ and to end ‘the unhealthy environment created by unfounded and false allegations’.

On hearing the news of Zardari’s compliments, Modi said it is victory of 6 Crore Gujaratis, most of whom have always been willing to bury the truth and move on.

Though critics see more of acting than action in the announcement, Zardari remains unfazed. Supreme Court of Pakistan has not passed any strictures against him till date as the cases are still in lower court.  Zardari claimed it as his victory and expressed eagerness to bury the discomforting memories of the past. He is likely to be accompanied by top ranks of Lashkar-e-taiyaba and Jamat-ud-Dawa in this goodwill mission, who have expressed similar sentiments towards India. 

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Modi Dreams To Make Gujarat Goebbel Hub For ‘ IT’ : Announces JG Centre for Interpretation Techniques

Fake News Brew-row
Gandhinagar, Sept.14

Gujarat is all set to have a first-of-its-kind Centre for Interpretation Techniques at Gandhinagar. It will be led by Chief Minister of the state, Narendra Modi. Having vast experience of interpreting and showing adverse and procedural court judgements as ‘clean chit’ to him, Modi thought he was best suited to lead the centre himself. The centre has been named Dr. Joseph Goebbels Centre for Interpretation Techniques with a special division to be known as Centre For Clean Cheats.

Narendra Modi has done a yeoman service to much discredited field of concocting and spreading convenient untruths –if not lies- and hiding inconvenient truths by doing it as a democratically elected chief minister. He has emerged as a successful practitioner of the craft, which has left his opponents sulking. Committed to growth of Gujarat, he is keen to make Gujarat global -or may be- Goebbels-hub in producing ‘Clean Cheat-ers’.

Talking to the press, Modi remembered Dr. Goebbels’ famous quote ‘Repeat a lie a thousand times and it becomes truth’ and quipped `you need not repeat it a thousand times these days. Just manufacture it and TV channels will do the rest.’ Modi has offered to teach a lesson or two on how to convert negative press in to positive to US president Obama whose public ratings have fallen disastrously in recent times. 

Monday, September 12, 2011

Your MESSage Is My Life: A Day After 10th Anniversary of 9/11, Mahatma Gandhi Talks Exclusively To 'Originally Fake'

Mahatma Gandhi in Con-versation with Urvish Kothari
Fakes-clusive Interview
Unknown location, Sept.12

courtesy: Cristian Penas
Mahatma Gandhi, a peace warrior of international repute who almost made to Noble Peace Prize had he not rested in peace in 1948 only to be resurrected on currency notes of higher denominations later on, has shared his insight on present day world order, exclusively to Originally Fake.

Mostly remembered for his quotable quotes, Mahatma-the Great Soul- is at it again, this time on many issues including 10th anniversary of 9/11. Some of them might sound similar to their earlier versions appeared in his periodicals  like ‘Naive-jivan’. , ‘Harried-Jan’, ‘Ernst & Young India'.

Mahatma opened the conversation saying, ‘I am not consistent with the past, I am consistent with the truth’ and moved on to offer pearls harbouring his wisdom.

On 10th anniversary of 9/11 & US foreign policy
  • Eyewash for an eyewash will put the world in bind .or is it  'I' for an 'I' makes the whole world blind to see the larger picture?
  • The victories of Lie have never been won without risks, often of the gravest character.. as evident in the case of US foreign policy.
  • Strength does not come from physical capability though I am not sure about Drone & stealth helicopters.
  •  Culture of the mind must be subservient to the culture of the hurt.

On strip-searching at US airports
I do not believe that the means justify the end

On Indian Demo-crazy
Suffering, cheerfully endured, ceases to be suffering and is transmuted into an ineffable joy- especially in parliamentary demi-crazy democracies.

On Anna Movement
When you have a good cause never descend to personalities .

On his inclusion in Time’s ‘Top 100 of 20th century’ list
Time is merciless enemy, it it is also a merciful friend and healer.

On Wall Street Crash
Demands of ‘equity’ supersede the letter of law.

Tip to UPA Government
(Sushma) Swaraj won without sacrifice cannot last long